Schadenfreude, for those of you not forced to sit through classes in either philosophy or theology, is joy or pleasure experienced at the misfortune of others. If somebody has been nasty to you at work and they don’t actually get that promotion they were expecting, the emotion you experience can probably be categorized as schadenfreude, although in this case it’s maybe a little less troubling than other examples of that emotion.

I started thinking about schadenfreude the other day when I started reading articles about Lindsay Lohan’s hosting of Saturday Night Live. Most of the reviews were negative. Some were brutal. But what struck me most was the tone of thinly disguised glee in some of the write-ups, a tone that frequently comes through in articles about Lohan. I’d sum it up as, “Yeah, she’s a mess—isn’t it delicious?”

Lohan’s not the only one to get this treatment, of course. Britney Spears got it until her family yanked her off center stage. Many reality television “stars” like Snooki get it. In fact, any celebrity (loosely defined) who acts up or is caught with his/her pants down is likely to inspire huge clouds of schadenfreude, both from reporters and from the people who read the reports.

In a sense tabloid reporters serve up these celebrity train wrecks so that we can feel good about ourselves at the expense of others. They have wealth (at least a little), fame, and toys—all the things we’re supposed to want—and they’re train wrecks. I may lack the things they have, but at least I haven’t been photographed climbing out of a car sans underwear (heaven forbid!). Sucksboo to you!

The thing is, though, schadenfreude isn’t really an emotion that philosophers recommend. According to Wikipedia (yeah, I use it too), Schopenhauer said “To feel envy is human, to savor schadenfreude is devilish,” and I can see his point. Using somebody else’s failure to make yourself feel better isn’t exactly the road to virtue. I’d draw a distinction here between being pleased that somebody has suffered the kind of comeuppance her/his actions have invited (::cough:: Rush Limbaugh ::cough::), and being pleased just because somebody is having a hard time. Being happy that Netflix had to back down on Quikster doesn’t make me a bad person. Being happy that Whitney Houston’s daughter is having problems does.

In fact, schadenfreude may actually be the definition of a jerk. People who look at others’ misery and say, “There, see, you’re not so special” aren’t exactly model citizens. They are, in point of fact, dickwads.

In reality, I wish Lindsay Lohan well. She used to be a decent actress (check out Mean Girls or Prairie Home Companion). Yes, her problems are largely self-inflicted, but I’d still like to see her pull herself together. And I’d like to see tabloid reporters stop playing this game, reveling in somebody else’s misery in order to make their readers feel good about their lives. But I won’t hold my breath. Schadenfreude seems to be the order of the day.