I’ve lived in two prime tourist destinations for the last twenty-five years or so—San Antonio and Denver. I’ve also been a tourist myself several times during those twenty-five years. All of which is to say I have a sort of wide-ranging POV on tourists and their problems since I’ve seen them from both sides.

People who live and work in tourist destinations have a kind of love/hate relationship with the tourists themselves. They can cause all kinds of problems, from excessive traffic to general cluelessness. Natives can frequently find themselves slipping into a mindset where all tourists are morons—why the hell don’t they know you can’t walk up the trail to Fish Creek Falls in flipflops without risking a broken neck? But here’s the thing—they don’t know that because they’re tourists. They’re Not From Around These Parts. Yes, they could ask, but in many cases the person to ask isn’t obvious. And some tourists are mortally afraid of bothering somebody by interrupting them (I’ve been there myself).

These thoughts were prompted by a week in Washington, DC as a tourist. I had some delightful experiences, but I also had some real bummers, prompted by people who were obviously sick to death of dealing with tourists like me. So here, in no particular order, are some random observations.

1. The guards at the various museums (National Gallery, National Portrait Gallery, American History, etc.) were uniformly polite and helpful. This is doubly admirable because these are the people who frequently encounter tourists at their worst—photographing artwork in rooms that are clearly marked “No Photos” or touching sculptures that have “Don’t Touch” emblazoned all over them. And yet most of them smile and answer questions courteously. When I walked out of a room with a blinding neon sculpture at the Hirschhorn, one guard shook his head and said, “Ma’am, if you’re seeing spots, you’d better sit down for a minute and let your eyes adjust.” Now that’s an example of being helpful without being asked.

2. On the other hand, food service and gift store workers (at least at the National Gallery) were uniformly sour. I realize these jobs aren’t exactly high end, but these tourists do pay your salary. Snarling at them is not a nice idea.

3. The surliest personnel I encountered on both of my recent trips to the DC area were the drivers on the trolley in Alexandria, VA. This is a shame because Alexandria itself is a lovely town to walk around in. This time I heard one of the drivers complaining that people “don’t follow the rules.” But the thing is, these people Aren’t From Around These Parts. They don’t know the rules. A simple “I’ll be loading in five minutes” or “You’ll need to take the bus to get where you want to go” would work better than a snarl. As a general rule, it’s better to help tourists out of their cluelessness than to punish them for being clueless in the first place.

When I lived in San Antonio, there was a constant pressure to be polite and friendly with visitors. The city had a long-standing rep as a place where the people were nice and worked hard to make you feel at home. Denver has a similar goal, although the tourists in Colorado are spread out over a wider patch. DC didn’t have that feel. Although there were lots of nice people, there were enough nasty ones to leave a bad taste. Maybe it was because it was August and hot (but, of course, August is a lot hotter in San Antonio). Maybe it was because this it a tough year in DC (but, of course, it’s been even tougher in Denver). Maybe it’s just that when you’ve got tourists all the time, you get a little sick of them. All I can say is, from now on if I know someone’s a tourist, I’ll be going out of my way to be polite. What goes around, as they say, comes back to bite you.