So I see from the Sports page that Colt McCoy, former quarterback for the UT Longhorns, has a brother named Case who is the current quarterback for the Longhorns. I mention this only because the McCoys are the only men I’ve ever run into who actually have names that sound like romance heroes.

Think about it—how many times in real life have you run into guys named Colt or Cade or Lex or Jax or, well, just about any romance hero you can name? I don’t know about you, but the closest I come is my nephew Cody, and even that’s a more common name than, say, Mikal. Most of the guys I know fall into the Bill/Bob/Dave/Harry/Tony nexus. But even the slightly more exotic names like Josh or Ben or Mark don’t show up in romance as often as Nate or Chance or Cade or Seth or Wade.

I’m as guilty as anybody in this—my Toleffson heroes are named Cal, Pete, Lars, and Erik. Of the four, only the name Pete has shown up regularly in my experience. I named the hero of Brand New Me after Steve Earle’s song “Tom Ames’ Prayer,” so his name was a little more run-of-the-mill. But the hero of my newest, Don’t Forget Me, is Nando Avrogado, not exactly your guy on the street.

Why do we do this? I think part of it is to create the sort of fairytale atmosphere you find in most romance novels—these aren’t normal people and this isn’t a normal situation. But it’s also a kind of instant characterization. A guy named Chance has a head start on being a romantic hero, simply because he’s not someone you’d run into in your daily errands. And, of course, we’re not alone in this. Tennessee Williams has heroes named Chance, Val, Brick, Kilroy, and Shannon. If you need an indicator that these plays don’t take place next door, the names alone should be enough.

So why don’t we run into these wildly romantic names in real life, given the number of women who read romance and might name their sons after their favorite heroes? I think probably because they’re a little too wildly romantic. If you name your son Chance, you’re putting a heavy burden on his shoulders (not to mention setting him up to be the punch line in several dozen bad jokes). It’s going to be hard for him to settle for being an accountant or an insurance agent. So most of us give our kids names that are a little more anchored in reality. But we still love the romance heroes who don’t sound anchored there at all.

So my hat’s off to the McCoys. Not only did the parents give their sons names that sound like they should be Pony Express riders or sheriffs in Deadwood, but they raised two boys who lived up to all the implications those names involve. After all, quarterback for the University of Texas is nothing to sneeze at. However, if you decide to name your own son Colt, I suggest you might want to give him a middle name like George. After all, he might need someplace to retreat if he decides he really wants to live in the suburbs with a wife, two kids, and a golden retriever.